Today was a little stressful - Today we met Nations (Mikel's birth mom) for lunch at the Varsity for the first time since we picked him up in March. When the adoption process started we promised her we would keep in touch and let her see Mikel periodically. I made a hard decision on that day, whether I wanted the adoption open or closed. In the end I figured it would be best for Mikel to know who his birth mom is for a few reasons: he will one day realize I am not his biological mom (hmm, I wonder why..); Nations does love her children and that is why she wanted them to have a better life; we want to continue to love Nations and show her the love of Jesus. However, realizing those factors and acting on them are two different things.
So this week we decided to grant Nations' wish and meet for lunch. About 2 p.m. we drove up to the Varsity, all the while I felt like a rock was in my stomach, and Nations walked up to the car. I unbuckled Mikel and she immediately took him from me. At first I felt a little resentment, Mikel is now my baby, but then I remembered that she didn't want to run away with him, she just wanted to hold him. We went inside with Nations, Mikel's big sister (Tatiana), and Tatiana's adoptive family and ate lunch. The whole afternoon went well. All the kids played together, Nations got to visit with us and her children, and we all bonded a little closer. After two hours we were all exhausted and went our own ways. Once we got in the car I was drained from emotional stress, but I felt like we had made the right decision. I know we will get together again, and it will get easier with each passing event. I also know with each passing event we will get closer with Nations and she will feel more like extended family instead of the "other mom" or just "the birth mom". God gave us all such comfort and peace when we were around each other today, and I know he will continue as long as we let him :).
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